I hadn't worn a touch of makeup in a week. He just shook his head. "You're beautiful as always. Tell me what's going on."I looked at him and took a de...p breath. I could tell him anything. So I spilled my guts. After all of that, I had the sudden urge to cut. I hadn't cut in years. It was a habit I'd stopped and wanted to never do again, but the urge came at me strongly. He saw it in my eyes. "What are you thinking?" he asked me. I looked down and then back to him. "I dunno. I just want to cut.". I could make excuses of why I felt this way but the truth was I wanted to feel it fucking my pussy, or even my ass. I felt the fog of lust gripping my mind and I knew this battle was lost when I thought of sucking it, feeling it jerking in my mouth, knowing I was sucking a dog's dick. I shuddered as my body thrilled at that thought. Damn I thought am I really this disgusting a person? My tongue wetted my lips as I thought of sucking it. Can I do that, really do it I wondered. I sat up alongside. ' If he thought Charlotte's sociabilitywas an invitation to join them he was mistaken. As he went to sit on his normalperch at the bar, the women went and sat near the window and waited for thewaiter. He ordered a Merlot but it didn't taste. Not that there was a problemwith the wine, it was the fact he was alone, he needed something stronger.Jazz was being quietly piped round the bar, usually he never noticed the musicbut today it was reminding him how much he hated jazz. Like chalk squealingon. " When Autumn died?" Jamie said. "That's where it happened, Jimmy. She couldn't bear the truth of what had happened to Autumn or the reality that it could happen to her. She knew the truth; that her parents had sold her sister into slavery – or let Hightower do it – and she hated them for it. Her hatred of them kept her from being able to be the submissive little slut they wanted her to be. She couldn't keep it up. The only way was to deny the truth and convince herself that Autumn had died. So.
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